My name is Jessica. I am a mother of a smart and handsome 14 year old named Charlie and the wife of an equally handsome, smart and wonderful human being named Chris. He is a Lieutenant Colonel in the Army, which makes me…..still just his wife but more specifically and Army Wife, which comes with its own set of wonderful and proud moments and not so wonderful moments. I also have a job outside the home, I teach college Spanish. I basically teach ‘barely adults’ to say ‘where’s the bathroom’, ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ in countries they will probably never travel to but it deems them deserving of credits they need to obtain a degree. College kids are great but sometimes just as exhausting as middle schoolers. They are just starting life, however, and that is beautiful to witness.
ABOUT THE BLOG:
I called it AdoptPeru because I think that more people choosing to adopt here in the states should consider this south american country, then maybe we can have more agencies that work with Peru. I will go through the process, document it and see if, in fact, it is a good choice. The verdict is still out but so far so good!
We have not shared our intentions to adopt with family or friends yet, only with those whom we chose as character witnesses in our paperwork. My sister is one of them and although she was unsure about us doing this, she seems to be a little excited about it (though probably won’t admit it). When we talk about it we refer to the potential child as Peru Child, hence the title “Bringing Home Peru Child”. I am sure as the process gets closer to a placement we will not need that reference but until then and for the purpose of this blog, we’ll also call him/her Peru Child.
The blog was created for three reasons. First, I need something to occupy my time while I wait. Wait between home visits, wait between paperwork and eventually wait to have a child placed with us. Second, I want to make people aware of Peru as a country to adopt. I am a bit biased, since it is my birthplace, but in the process and research on adoption we have found it to be a great choice thus far. The third and last reason is simply to make it easier on the military family and potential adoptive parents. The military has its challenges when it comes to supporting the families in non traditional situations like infertility, adoption etc. Sometimes we have to go outside for resources that should be supported within our special communities. Hopefully this too will change!
About Our Journey to Adoption
This journey really began in the summer of 2002 at Fort Rucker Alabama. As we dotted over our first born we deluded ourselves, as many new parents do, that we could do this all over again. This was around our son’s second birthday, you know, the time when you start seeing those two years with what I like to refer to as “baby goggles”, similar to beer goggles but a whole lot worse. The time where memories of labor pains and sleepless nights are replaced by phrases like “labor was miraculous” and “ he was such a good sleeper”. This is also the time where you are annoying to your single friends and dangerous to your newly married ones. I say dangerous because as the gullible honeymoon stage is nearing its end they are inclined to replace it with just about anything that would make them as close or closer to that partner they are starting to see as, dare I say it, annoying. Just so you know, during her “miraculous” experience she will think of a few ways to kill you.
So here we were 2 years into one child and decided to try it again. We began the ritual of conceiving the same way we did with our first, cheap meals and lots of alcohol. It was not too alarming when 2 months of drunken rendezvous didn’t generate results, it was fun and we were young so it didn’t matter. I don’t remember when exactly I became concern about the fact that it no longer came as easy as the first. I guess it was a year into it. Of course at this point all that we looked for to remediate the problem was finding different positions and maybe less alcohol. We were still not at the point of alarm since there were many other things going on in our lives at the time and like I said before….we were young. I also had not heard of many people experiencing infertility, I doubt I’d even heard the term for couples who had already conceived without assistance. Nevertheless infertility was not even in my vocabulary at that time.
Fast forward 10 years…….wow I’m old.
It is October of 2011 as we prepared to do a cycle of IVF after many failed IUIs and clomid cycles, we were told that my uterus lining is too thin, I had a retroverted uterus and a lot of scar tissue, all of which meant that IVF will be unsuccessful and a natural pregnancy (if it happens at all) will be risky. This news shattered the very limited hopes we had at this point to grow our family…. the biological way that is!
It took my husband Chris a month or so to know for sure that adoption is the journey he wanted to take. It took me 2.5 years.
If we thought infertility while being in the military was a nightmare we were now going to try our hand at adoption.
May you find something in our process that will help you, save you some money or time and may your journey be joyous!